PINK-5757
by SithlingDemiwizard
Summary: Dolores Umbridge has somehow found herself as a prisoner of the Galactic Empire. What will happen when she gets dumped in the stormtrooper program with a few familiar faces?


Dolores Umbridge was a very tolerant woman, but, like everyone, there were some things that she just could not stand for. Muggles, Harry Potter, half-breeds, Harry Potter, liars, Harry Potter, lies, Harry Potter, disloyalty, Harry Potter, children, Harry Potter, colours that aren't pink, Harry Potter, bitter-tasting things, Harry Potter, fireworks, Harry Potter, fun, Harry Potter, Quidditch, Harry Potter, student organisations, Harry Potter and waking up in strange places with no pink in sight were just a few of the things that she just could not stand for.

So she would not stand for her current situation. She was in a cold, white cell which was about as un-pinkish as it was possible to be. She wasn't even dressed in her usual pink, fluffy dress. Instead, she wore a brown...thing? that looked like something a house-elf would wear. Disgusting creatures, those house-elves.

Suddenly, what she had previously taken to be a wall slid open to reveal a man who looked as if he was dressed for Halloween. He wore a black mask and helmet, a black leather suit, black gloves and a long, black cape. On his chest was some sort of muggle device. Dolores snorted in disgust. She just could not stand for muggles. And to make matters worse, he had breathing problems! The sound of his breathing echoed through the small cell, louder than Dolores's own breath.

Following the Halloween-muggle-guy were two men who were also dressed for Halloween. They wore white armour on top of black suits with an expressionless white helmet on their head. What was it with these guys and helmets?

"I will not stand to be held prisoner by a muggle," she spat.

"A what?" the man dressed in black exclaimed.

"Non magic people who are inferior to us wizards," Dolores explained slowly.

"Why in the Force would the Emperor want to interrogate this prisoner? She's clearly lost her mind..." the man in black muttered to himself. "NS-1926!" he barked. "Secure the prisoner!"

"I will not stand to be touched by a muggle!" Dolores spat.

"HP-1771! Guard the door!" the man in black barked at the other man in white.

I can't keep calling them the man in black and the men in white, it's just getting confusing... Dolores thought to herself.

"Who are you?" she demanded as NS-1926 secured her hands behind her back.

"I am Lord Darth Vader, Commander of the Imperial Fleet," the man in black replied. "And unless you start showing me some respect, you will suffer," he hissed, leaning in closer.

"The Emperor specifically ordered you not to harm her," HP-1771 pointed out.

Dolores shot Vader a triumphant look, to which he glowered at under the mask.

"Perhaps, but there are other ways," Vader murmured thoughtfully.

Two days later...

"Who's that Stormtrooper with the pink armour?" TR-7171 asked.

"That's PINK-5757, she was a prisoner but Vader got frustrated with her and dumped her in the Stormtrooper program," FG-2222 replied.

"Wonder what she did..." AD-150 murmured.

As TR-7171, FG-2222 and AD-150 watched, PINK-5757 stood up and walked to the centre of the room. She ripped off her disgustingly pink helmet to reveal a toad-faced woman who looked absolutely furious.

"I WILL HAVE ORDER!" She shrieked, making all of the Stormtroopers in the area jump out of their skins. "I WILL NOT TOLERATE DISLOYALTY! YOU WILL DO AS I SAY! ALL STUDENT ORGANISATIONS ARE HENCEFORTH DISBANDED! ANY STUDENT WISHING TO BE A MEMBER OF THE INQUISITORIAL SQUAD WILL REPORT TO MY OFFICE! ALL STUDENTS WILL SUBMIT TO QUESTIONING ABOUT SUSPECTED ORGANISATIONS! I WILL HAVE ORDER!" PINK-5757 carried on like that for about ten minutes and it was a wonder that she didn't lose her voice. She was finally silenced when NS-1926 and HP-1771 rushed over and covered her mouth.

She glared at them over their hands, still shrieking although it was significantly muffled.

"Where's the nearest trash compactor?" NS-1926 asked.

PINK-5757 fell silent at that, her fake blue eyes widening in shock.

"Just around the corner," HP-1771 grinned under the helmet. They released her mouth and began to march her out the door.

"TELL THEM I MEAN NO HARM!" PINK-5757 shrieked over the shoulders of NS-1926 and HP-1771.

"Im sorry, professor," HP-1771 grinned under his helmet. "But we must not tell lies."

He then ripped off his helmet to reveal the grinning face of Harry Potter. Dolores Umbridge could not stand for Harry Potter. NS-1926 also ripped off his helmet to reveal the also-grinning face of Newt Scamander. She'd always hated Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them.

"How?" she exclaimed.

"We formed a brief alliance with Darth Vader," grinned Harry.

"You're lying!" Dolores shrieked.

"Professor, I never lie!"


End file.
